Artified, Schmartified

So dad, who may or may not have a splinter of a creative bone in his body, likes to play around with pictures for some posts as many of you do. 

Be nice, Smudge. It's fun to shake things up now and then.

Yeah, whatever. Anyhoo, he likes tinkering in lunapic and tried messing with a photo of our early morning routine. Honestly, if I hear the word "artified" one more time, I'll throw up in one of his shoes.  

Oh, come on, Mrs. Grumpy-Puss. A little tweaking never hurt anything. Relax, will you?

I'll make a deal with you, pops. I'll relax when you stop being an idiot. Sound good? 

Oh my god, between you and your mom...

Tread lightly there, mister.

That's more like it. Now go on, go to work. 

Fawn update: dad says he's seen what he assumes is the same little one prancing through the trees this past week. 

Oh Deer

So dad was out on the mower one day recently, and while riding along the fence line came upon this poor little thing.

The boss's property is routinely occupied by deer, so they're pretty much all over the place on any given day, but this one really caught dad by surprise, especially since the noise didn't scare him/her off. The poor little thing just lay there as the mower roared past and dad stopped quickly and shut it off. He got his phone out and, unsure what to do, looked up the number for the local animal control. He took a couple of quick pictures, and being fairly certain that the mom couldn't have been too far, started up the mower to move away from the fawn.

This scared the little one, who struggled to get up and, falling over once or twice, wobbled off into the trees, hopefully to the safety of his or her mom. Although it's hard to tell in the picture, dad said the little tyke was only about the size of a small toddler. 

Cat, Cooler and Carpet- an Early Morning Digression

Cat, Cooler and Carpet

Dad drew inspiration for the title of this post from a dinner special served at a long-since-demolished restaurant in South Deerfield, MA where he honed his cooking chops in his previous life. Beef, Bird and Bottle was a shamefully tissue-thin slice of prime rib, half of a chicken breast a l'orange, and a bottle of cheap-shit house wine. The 1704, attached to what used to be a Motel 6, was located next to a sprawling wooded lot that would eventually become the Yankee Candle Company's flagship store. The restaurant, dad believes, took its name from the Deerfield Massacre. Wait, what were we talking about?